杨澜事件是真的吗:求几篇英语短文或诗歌,笑话也行

1。Good Intentions
良好的心愿

One day a boy came to his teacher and said:" Teacher, pa wants to know if you like roast pig."
一天有个男孩去对他老师说：“老师，我爸想知道你是不是爱吃烤猪肉。”

"I certainly do," said the teacher, "and you tell your father he is very kind to think of me."
“当然罗，”老师说，“去告诉你父亲，多谢他想着我。”

Days passed, and nothing more was said about the roast pig.
好几天过去了，再没提起考猪肉的事儿。

Finally the teacher said to the boy:"I thought your father was going to send me over some roast pig."
最后老师对男孩说：“我以为你父亲要给我送点烤猪肉来呢。”

"Yes," said the boy, "he did intend to, but the pig sot well."
“是啊，”孩子说，“他是这么想的，可后来猪又没病了。”

2
Who Shot Abraham Lincoln

Mr. Smith and his son Rick were called to teacher 's classroom.

“ Mr. Smith, ” said the teacher, “ I asked Rick 'Who shot Abraham Lincoln?' and he said that he didn't do it! ”

“ Well, teacher, ” said Smith, “ if my kid said he didn't do it — he didn't do it! ” Father and son left the school, and on their way home, Smith turned to the boy and asked, “ Tell me, son, did you do it? ”

谁枪杀了阿拉伯罕·林肯

史密斯 先生和他的儿子瑞克被请进老师办公室。

“ 史密斯 先生，”老师说，“我问瑞克‘谁枪杀了阿拉伯罕·林肯？'他说不是他干的！”

“嗯，老师，” 史密斯说，“如果我的孩子说不是他干的，——那就不是他干的！”父亲与儿子离开学校，在回家的路上，史密斯问儿子：“告诉我，儿子，是你干的吗？”