百炼飞升录离线txt下载:求一篇很简单的英语故事，要有中文解释

THE TEACHER’S NATATION
During a Christmas exam, one of the questions was: “What causes a depression?” One of the students wrote: “God knows, I don’t know. Merry Christmas.” The exam paper came back with the teacher’s notation: “God gets 100, you get zero. Happy New Year.”
老师的评语
圣诞节考试的一个问题是：“什么导致经济萧条？”一个同学写到：“上帝知道，我不知道。圣诞快乐。”老师在试卷上批语：“上帝得100分，你得0分，新年快乐。”

A Kiss

At a dinner party, the speaker, who was the guest of honor, was about to deliver a speech when his wife sitting at the other end of the table, sent him a piece of paper with the word "KISS" scribbled on it.
The guest seated next to the speaker said, "Your wife must love you very much, I see her send you a 'KISS' before you begin your speech."
The speaker smiled and explained, "You don't know my wife. The 'KISS' she give me stands for 'Keep It Short, Stupid.'"

一个亲吻在晚餐会, 报告人, 是荣誉的客人, 将发表演说当他的妻子坐在另一边桌, 寄发他一张纸以词"亲吻" 被乱写对此。客人坐在报告人旁边说, "您的妻子必须非常爱您, 我看见她寄发您' 亲吻的在您开始您的讲话之前。" 报告人微笑和解释了, "您不知道我的妻子。' 亲吻的她给我立场为' 保留它短小, 愚笨。' "